I lost my father to suicide. He was only 56 years old when he shot himself. He left no note and there was nothing going on with him at the time that I am aware of. He was retired due to health reasons but seemed to be planning what he and my mother would do when she retired. He had fixed coffee that morning and had half a cup and was reading the Sunday newspaper when he apparently decide to get up and end his life. Though it has been 33 years ago it haunts me still. I just can’t seem to come to grips with it. My father and I were very close but I sensed nothing was wrong with him. My family was and is supportive but I can’t come to grips with my loss. I was only 29 years old when it happened. Then within 6 months I got a divorce, had to have a hysterectomy and lost my job. I do have depression and take meds for it. Counseling hasn’t been much help. Where do I turn now??